‘Long time, no see,’ I said ridiculously. ‘Please don’t make eye contact,’ I repeated to myself silently.īut of course, we made eye contact. I walked back to the nearest subway station to head back home.ĭuring the walk, I was in such a daze, ruminating about how the date had gone, that I didn’t realise that Kate had just passed me and was heading to the train station too.īut when I arrived on the platform, there she was, waiting for the same train. Like many people who live in Toronto and don’t drive, I rely on public transport. I politely told her that it had been nice to meet her, and shook her hand again, concluding our business. One excruciating hour later, we agreed to part ways and officially ended the date, silently acknowledging that there was no chemistry between us and knowing we would never see each other again. And unfortunately, I wasn’t open about my struggles. I felt like Kate was a little sympathetic, but I got the feeling she might have mistaken my anxiety for apathy. ‘I’m sorry, I don’t know what to say,’ I repeated five times – I know, I counted. We talked a little bit about work, but looking back, our entire exchange felt like a blur. I quietly sipped my latte, not knowing what to say to this lady in front of me, a potential partner. For the next five minutes, every time the door opened, I shot up in my seat, wondering if it was her. I arrived first and I got us a table near the entrance so I could see her walking in. I was definitely anxious but I bit the bullet.Ī few days later during a snowy evening in February, we convened at a local coffee shop in Toronto. So, we decided to take the next step and meet up. We bonded online about our mutual love for cats and our shared taste in films. My outgoing messages to matches were equally carefully crafted, like cover letters, always starting with questions like, ‘Who’s your favourite character from The Office?’ or ‘What’s your favourite restaurant in the city?’Īfter months of endless swiping (which really felt like a full-time job), I finally met Kate in the dead of winter. I wrote and edited my bio at least five times until I settled on something unique that captured my love for comedy, movies and sushi. I uploaded photos that were strategic and intentional – professional headshots and carefully selected pictures of myself when I was travelling. However, a good chat over dinner with friends one evening in early 2014 gave me the motivation I needed.
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